Honda Unveils Breakthrough Octabrid

Taking full advantage of the recent explosive popularity of hybrid vehicles, Honda has unveiled their latest breakthrough in automotive technology: the octabrid car.

“Continuing the tradition of innovation that we began with the Insight, Honda is proud to announce our exciting new car,” said a press release from Honda. “The new Honda Stan is powered by eight different fuel sources, making it four times better than the hybrids on the market today.”

In lieu of a traditional gas-powered engine, the Honda Stan is equipped with a cutting-edge drive system that converts eight sources of energy into motion:

  • batteries under the chassis
  • solar panels on the roof
  • windmills behind the grille
  • hamsters on wheels in the trunk
  • heat exchanger on the dash (powered by the driver’s breath)
  • hydroelectric generator (powered by rainfall collected on car roof)
  • 100% efficient bacon grease metabolizer
  • soap engine under the hood

The Stan is incredibly efficient as well as ultra-green, emitting only water vapor and bacon-scented soap bubbles.

Honda spokesman Chris Naughton explained the rationale behind jumping from hybrids straight to octabrids. “We looked at the safety razor industry and knew we didn’t want to get into the loop of constantly one-upping our competition,” he said. “So we figured we would just come right out and throw down the gauntlet. Jump from two straight to eight. Chew on that, Toyota.”

Retailing at $65,000, Honda’s target market for the Stan is consumers with large wallets and egos that are tied to owning high-tech gadgets and being “green.” Honda will begin selling the Stan in spring 2009 in Seattle, Portland, and San Francisco, eventually branching out to twenty metropolitan areas throughout the US by the end of 2010.

About the Author

John Fostr
Naked Loon Technology Reporter

4 Comments on "Honda Unveils Breakthrough Octabrid"

  1. Does anyone think they’ll come out with a car running just on bacon grease? Our family could fuel that car with no problem.

  2. Chotzie | 2008-06-24 at 8:29 AM |

    I wonder how heavy this car is and how fast it will go. Those are questions that didn’t get answered in the article. I don’t know if solar panels will work here in Seattle. But the bacon grease sounds good. My son will love driving that thing around.

  3. edith greenwood | 2008-07-04 at 8:43 PM |

    Everyone is entitled to laugh every day and your article fulfilled the bill. I laughed outloud.

  4. Great laugh-out-loud article! Thank you. Love Naked Loon (-:

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