Dino Rossi Adamantly Denies Ties to Local Charity

Republican candidate for Governor Dino Rossi issued a strong statement today denying any ties to charities in general and Seattle’s Union Gospel Mission in particular. A series of incriminating photographs have been revealed that show Rossi performing a number of selfless volunteer acts for Seattle’s Union Gospel Mission.

“I do not now, nor have I ever cared even the slightest bit about what happens to the homeless,” said Rossi. “This is just another of the baseless attacks that have become typical of my opponent.”

Allegations of Rossi’s involvement at the shelter began in May. At that time, Rossi denied having any sort of connection, saying “I don’t even know what the Union Gospel Mission is, but I definitely don’t support unions.” However, an in-depth investigative report by the Naked Loon uncovered evidence that contradicted Rossi’s claims.

Naked Loon investigators discovered that Rossi did in fact volunteer at the Mission at least five times in December of 2007, signing in with the false name “Horatio Morgan.”

When confronted with the evidence, Rossi reluctantly admitted that he had been to the Mission a number of times, but insisted that it was not reflective of his character or ability to lead.

“It was Christmas. I got carried away,” said Rossi. “I assure you, it was a one-time thing.”

Answering questions from reporters on Monday, Rossi campaign spokeswoman Jill Strait attempted to divert attention from the shelter debacle to Rossi’s voting record in the state Senate. “The important thing is that Dino Rossi has consistently voted in favor of eliminating benefits to the homeless,” she said.

Recent polls show Rossi trailing Christine Gregoire in the race for the state’s top position by three to six percentage points. He currently holds a sixty-point lead in the key homeless-hating demographic, a voting bloc that campaign observers say he cannot afford to lose.

“Let’s try to focus on the real issues,” said Rossi. “Voters don’t care that I may have served at a homeless shelter once or drop-kicked a baby panda a couple of times.”

About the Author

Ash Grimm
Naked Loon Political Reporter

5 Comments on "Dino Rossi Adamantly Denies Ties to Local Charity"

  1. James in The E-WA Wastelands (and lovin' it) | 2008-07-22 at 9:32 PM |

    Dang heartless conservatives. The liberals would have definitely made it a priority to at least talk about thinking about doing something for the homeless … as long as someone else paid for it of course.

  2. Wrong! Liberals think about talking about it, then say something that heartless conservatives will then rubber stamp out with their cold jackboot stampin’ boots with spikey jacks. Hint: only heartless conservatives pay taxes.

  3. I’m confused (as usual). I see no problem with the guy pulling the plug on homeless benefits, then showing up at the mission. It’s just say-one-thing-do-another politics as usual (only kinda backwards), isn’t it?

  4. leehamster | 2008-07-28 at 10:06 AM |

    This could really put his AWB endorsement in jeopardy.

  5. Ulysses | 2008-07-28 at 6:02 PM |

    “drop-kicked a baby panda”

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