An exciting new television series set right here in Seattle is scheduled to begin this off-season, and The Naked Loon is here to bring you the scoop.
Everyone knows someone that has been affected by some type of disaster: earthquakes, hurricanes, tornadoes, Republicans… Here in the Northwest we’ve been fortunate not to have been struck by many extreme disasters, but every time we hear of catastrophes like a big earthquake in Asia or yet another monster attack on New York City, we can’t help but wonder: what if a big disaster struck here?
The answer to that question is simple: we are thoroughly screwed. However, just because we know the degree to which we are hosed doesn’t mean that we can’t explore other important questions now, before disaster strikes.
The new series will focus in on one such question: who can we pre-assign blame to for the ruinous consequences of an inevitable disaster?
The Seattle-based reality show will be called “Get Your Blame On,” and will air on Fox. Each week the show will describe a possible disaster scenario that may befall the Puget Sound, and a panel of local residents, business leaders, and politicians will explore the question of who will shoulder the blame for the devastating fallout.
If an earthquake takes out the Alaskan Way Viaduct, killing hundreds of commuters, is that the state legislature’s fault? Is it the governor’s fault? Is it Greg Nickels’ fault? “Get Your Blame On” will answer these pressing questions, entertaining the masses while simultaneously performing the vitally important function of pre-placing the blame so we can avoid political squabbling after the fact.
Or what if the Space Needle inexplicably tumbles to the ground crushing the EMP, while the floating bridges simultaneously sink into the lake and every Trader Joe’s, PCC, and Whole Foods in the area burns to the ground? Once we get our carbon-neutral torches and recycled pitchforks, whose house should we storm?
“Get Your Blame On” will answer these questions and many more like them. It premiers Wednesday June 18 at 9:00 on Fox.
Where can one audition to be on the panel?
Look as the ‘global warming’ continues, water is evaporated from the ground and that causes earthquakes. I believe we can blame everything on ‘global warming’. I want to outlaw all beer beverages in Seattle because JUST IN CASE YOU WANT TO KNOW: those bubbles in those beers contain the HATED CARBON DIOXIDE. Everytime you pop the top you leave a BIG CARBON FOOTPRINT on the poor mother earth. AND SHAME ON YOU GUYS WHO DRINK BEER AND WATCH TV AND FOOTBALL. LOOK AT ALL THE CLIMATE CHANGE PROBLEMS THAT YOU ARE IGNORING WHEN YOU COULD BE DRINKING ORGANIC WATER AND WATCHING THE NEW GREEN CHANNEL.