Ballard Denny’s Decision Sparks Trend
Robot Mariners Extend Perfect Record in 23,145 to 6 Victory Over Sheep-Clone Angels
In his 6,523rd career game, EDGARTRON-3000 led the Robot Mariners to their landmark 65,536th consecutive win Friday night against the Los Angeles Sheep-Clone Angels.
As usual, the team scored precisely 23,145.0 runs in a perfectly precise execution of baseball. The nine-inning romp included an average of 642.9167 home runs by each of the nine electronic players as the team extended its league-leading record to 3.91*1075
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Stop Whining and Start Visualizing
You know what? I have had it with all the gloomy, depressing talk about the economy. I think it is time for us to stop whining, get off our butts, and do something about this mess we find ourselves in.
There is nothing we can do to change the past. We should not dwell on the fact that George W. Bush has personally ruined our careers, destroyed our hard-earned home equity, and driven us into suffocating credit card debt. Now is not the time for that.
Local
City of Kirkland Outlaws Layoffs
In a decisive and timely move during an emergency special session Saturday night, the Kirkland city council voted unanimously to pass Ordinance 4188, which prohibits any further layoffs at any company within the city limits.
“As the economic crisis continues deepen, Kirkland simply cannot afford to be marred by the destructive connotations associated with layoffs,” said Kirkland Mayor James Lauinger in a prepared statement.
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Nickels: Seattle #1 Bestest City in Universe
WILL IT NEVER END?!?
Is this too fast for you to understand. It is part of the new LIBERAL radio talk show. All Democrats are ordered to listen to it and since you cannot understand anything being said, you just go on with your day and blindly do whatever the union big brother tell you to do.
Seattle has their own ‘Onion’ !!! This is so unbeleiveably great !!! Yay !!!
Is that a question, Bob?
Oh, and everyone hates LIBERAL radio. We can’t have LIBERALS around. LIBERALS obviously don’t think, and they eat babies. That’s what Bob’s cousin told me, anyway.
Actually, liberals DO eat babies. For real.
And they don’t think. Check out Pharyngula for examples.
And, FWIW, The Naked Loon is one of the funniest things I have ever seen. Keep up the good work!!