Local Filmmaker Smooshes Ant, Creates Indie Film

A groundbreaking independent film screening this weekend in Seattle takes an insightful, entertaining, and totally original look into the mind of nature’s most overlooked insect: the ant.

Local filmmaker Andy Todd’s new film, Ant: The Awakening, will premier Saturday to an audience of pretentious indie-film-enthusiasts at the Jewel Box Theater in Belltown.

The premier showing is already sold out, but Todd was gracious enough to give us a preview of what we can expect when we pirate the film online in a few weeks:

Okay, see there’s this ant. One day, suddenly and completely inexplicably, he becomes self-aware. It thinks to itself “hey, I exist, and I’m in control of my own destiny!”

It’s a pretty big deal for an ant to have these sorts of thoughts, right? Well, the ant realized what a big deal it was, and tried to communicate it to his peers in ant-kind, but they were too busy being regular ants to listen to him. So he sets out in search of someone he can declare his self-realization to.

After walking for what seems like hundreds of miles (but is really only a few hundred feet), he comes across a bird. For a moment the thought of engaging the bird in conversation crosses his mind, but he realizes that he will likely be eaten if he drew attention to himself.

So he quietly slips by the bird, continuing his quest, until eventually he discovers this mind-bogglingly enormous structure, clearly not of natural origin. “This must be evidence of another self-aware creature,” he reasons.

Making his way around the perimeter of the edifice, searching for a way in, the ant could barely contain his enthusiasm. “It will be good to share existence with someone else,” he pondered.

Finally he discovered an opening, and giddily made his way inside. Exploring the interior of the structure proved to be even more exciting than the ant had thought, and before long he was lost in thought.

Soon, a rumbling in the ground shakes the ant from its daydreaming state. He is so energized and eager about meeting the creator of this amazing place he is nearly incontinent. A massive form appears from around the corner. As it draws nearer, the ant calls out: “Hello! I exist!”

Apparently unaware of the ant’s presence, the giant life form continues about its business. Determined to get this thing’s attention, the ant decides to take drastic measures.

He makes his way to the creature and began climbing the vast length to what the ant assumed was its head. At last the ant nears the head, and he begins to shout: “Hey, you! Over here! I exist!”

The colossal being seemed to take notice. “Finally,” sighed the ant, “someone to share—” But before he can finish the thought, one of the creature’s massive appendages sweeps down as if from nowhere, landing squarely and forcefully on the ant, instantly crushing it.

“Stupid ants,” mutters the boy as he brushed the remains of the ant off his neck. “How do they keep getting in here,” he wonders as he finishes making his sandwich.

Be sure to check out Todd’s other indie hits: Dog: Fetch Time, Raccoon: Garbage Scout, and Hummingbird: Colorful Menace?

About the Author

Alfred Matthew
Naked Loon Entertainment Reporter

1 Comment on "Local Filmmaker Smooshes Ant, Creates Indie Film"

  1. ‘Suddenly and completely inexplicably, he becomes self-aware. It thinks to itself “hey, I exist, and I’m in control of my own destiny!”’
    So if an ant can get that far and a man can go to the trouble of making a movie about an ant that goes that far, how is it that the vast majority of humans just don’t bother at all?
    The ant so wanted to declare his self-realization but died in trying to tell the first person he met.
    Perhaps that is my fate: ‘Hey, Instant Self Realization!”

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