The Papyrus Virus

The Papyrus Virus 2009-07-18

King County Metro Buses: Now With 100% More Papyrus!

The Burke Museum resorts to Papyrus to tout their coffee exhibit on the back of King County Metro buses. As if dedicating an entire exhibit…

The Papyrus Virus

Tap Plastics Bids Farewell to Papyrus

The Papyrus Virus

Starbucks Tries to Out-McDonald’s McDonald’s

Seattle-based Starbucks Coffee—the McDonald’s of drug-laced drink outlets—faces an growing challenge to their core business model as Chicago-based McDonald’s—the McDonald’s of cheap and disgusting hamburgers—pushes into the world of over-priced status-symbol beverages with an increasingly intense campaign.

Starbucks has faced difficulty in recent years, as their increasingly ridiculous gimmicks have failed to draw in and retain a customer base capable of supporting their breakneck rate of expansion, peaking in 2007 when they opened an average of five new stores every second.

2009-01-13

How To: Avoid Layoff-pocalypse Victimization

With something like eleven out of every ten companies in the Seattle area laying people off these days, it’s probably about time for those of you who still have a job to plan your layoff apocalypse survival strategy.

Intrepid Naked Loon staff members have endured a grueling schedule packed full of interviews with firing managers, library visits to scour the internets, and hour after hour crunching HR statistics—all to help you keep your job. Aren’t we great.

2008-11-02

What Are We Dreaming Of?

(Visit The Naked Loon to view this life-altering graphic)

2008-04-16

Hundreds of Thousands Return to Self-Centered Lives

Over 175,000 people returned to their usual self-centered lives today after attending various events during the Dalai Lama’s five-day “Seeds of Compassion” Seattle tour.

Throughout his visit to Seattle, the Dalai Lama spoke extensively of kindness and compassion, to approving applause from crowds numbering in the tens of thousands. Following these inspirational events, residents of the Seattle area promptly went back to their day-to-day lives, living in exactly the same way as before.

2008-12-31

Nickels: Seattle #1 Bestest City in Universe

Seattle Mayor Greg Nickels’ extended his recent streak of secreting pure, unfiltered awesomeness on Wednesday by officially declaring Seattle as the “Number One Bestest City in the Entire Universe—For All Time.”

The bold call comes hot on the heels of his proclamation that the city’s response to the Colossal Blizzard Whiteout of Aught-Eight deserves a “B,” widely considered by critics to be his most delightfully bizarre move to date.

The Papyrus Virus

King County Metro Buses: Now With 100% More Papyrus!

David Horsey: Papyrus Lover

I Heart Scott Kurtz

Tap Plastics Bids Farewell to Papyrus

Welcome to The Papyrus Virus!

The Papyrus Virus

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