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The Loony Bin 2009-01-13

Phishing Email of the Month

A helpful representative from eBay emailed me to let me know that my online has expired. Immediate action is necessary…

Google to Seattle: Seriously Guys, Drop Dead

In a hand-written note wrapped around a brick thrown through a Seattle City Hall window, San Francisco-based Google Inc. reiterated its position Wednesday that they will “never, ever, not in a thousand million years be bringing Street View to Seattle.”

The message from the internet giant cleared up confusion among Seattle residents, a number of whom reported spotting Google Street View cars roaming area streets over four months ago…

Google: Street View Not Coming to Seattle, So There

In a press release published Friday, internet technology leader Google announced that its revolutionary Street View technology will not be expanded to include coverage of the Seattle area, ever.

Friday’s statement from the internet giant finally answered the question that has been on many tech-savvy Seattle residents’ minds: When is Seattle going to get Street View? The answer, according to Google, is never.

Naked Loon Travel: Boston

As a resident of the greater Seattle area, you know that there is no better place on Earth than the perfect paradise we live in here in the Puget Sound.

While traveling outside of our green and blue utopia is a decidedly bizarre and unnatural course of action, it is understandable that you might sometimes find yourself wondering what life is like for the unprivileged masses that are doomed to live in the less desirable 99.99% of the planet.

Thankfully for you, The Naked Loon is rushing to your aid yet again, going places you don’t want to go and coming back to bring you all the disturbing details. This month’s punishing journey takes our roving reporter 2,500 miles away, clear over to the shriveled husk of an allegedly-once-great city: Boston, Massachusetts.

Dave Barry Announces Dave Barry: The Musical

Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist, author, and totally serious presidential candidate Dave Barry took a brief break from his whirlwind Olympic trip Monday to unveil his latest project: Dave Barry: The Musical.

“I’m really excited that I will finally get a chance to share Dave Barry: The Musical with my fans,” said Barry in a live video feed from his Beijing hotel. “I think they will both really get a kick out of it.”

Although many critics feared that Barry would follow up his film adaptation of his book “Dave Barry’s Complete Guide to Guys” with a stage version of the same, Barry reports that Dave Barry: The Musical consists of entirely new material.

Barry has been working on the stage production since 2003, when a talking platypus outlined the original plot for him in a lucid dream.

Blackberries: Heck Yeah

If you thought this article was going to be about some boring piece of technology, you’re a nerd. No, I’m not here to talk about cell phones. I’m here to talk about fruit. It’s just about that time of the year again: blackberry season! Yum!

As the most prolific weed west of the Cascades, blackberries can be found all over the Puget Sound. In my professional opinion (I have a Ph.D. in complex berry neuroscience), if you lives around here and pay money to buy blackberries, you are one of three things:

stupid
lazy
a giant wuss

Actually, knowing you, you’re probably all three. Seriously, there is no excuse not to pick your own blackberries. None.

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