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Retailtastic 2008-08-27

Welcome to Retailtastic!

Welcome to the new Naked Loon blog Retailtastic, everybody! I love to shop, and I am totally excited about the opportunity to share some of my exhilarating shopping experiences with you all!

Occasionally when I’m out shopping I’ll notice something crazy, and I think “wow, I really wish I could tell a bunch of people about this.” Well now I can! Lucky you!

2008-11-09

Top Entertainment Choices For Disaffected Sonics Fans

(Visit The Naked Loon to view this life-altering graphic)

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2008-05-29

Anti-Depressant Manufacturers Thrilled by Oncoming Recession

Although most families find that the onset of a recession is a hardship to be overcome, there is a silver lining to every cloud. One such example is the makers of various anti-depressant medications, for whom the prospect of impending national economic difficulty is like winning the lottery.

As consumers across the nation tighten their belts and cut back on all but the basic necessities, often the first things to go are the budgets for entertainment and eating out. While a lack of amusing distractions coupled with a job loss or pay cut may leave families feeling down and out, it has drug makers smiling ear to ear.

“In these trying times,” said Pfizer CEO Jeff Kindler, “we are overjoyed to be in a position that allows us to reap massive profits by giving people the ability to chemically alter their mood.”

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2008-05-22

A Collection of Poetry

Hi, my name is Alexander and I am in the eighth grade. I am an above average English student and author. I don’t prefer to write very much, but I can write pretty good. I can do poetry O.K. if I try real hard, as I have done in this column. This column will show my creativity. Some of the poems will not be that great, but they are my best.

Thank You, and enjoy.

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2009-01-20

TOTALLY JUSTIFIED OBAMA OVERLOAD!!!!!!

Today at noon Eastern, in a magnificent ceremony overflowing with more majesty and splendor than a human mind is capable of comprehending, President-elect Barack Obama will be sworn in as the forty-fourth President of the United States of America, ushering in a new age of eternal peace, prosperity, and oneness for all mankind.

As preparations for the crowning achievement of humankind finally come to a dramatic climax, tens of billions…

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2008-10-22

Violent Crime in Tacoma Sees Dramatic One Percent Drop

Law enforcement officials in Tacoma are ecstatic over an unprecedented one percent drop in the latest violent crime statistics.

It is important to note that although the announcement from the Sheriff’s Office implies that Tacoma’s violent crime rate declined by one percent, in actuality it was the rate of increase in violent crime that decreased by one percent—from a 9% year-to-year increase in September 2007 to an 8% increase in September 2008.

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