Living

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Question the Kostyra: Handling an Overbearing Mother?

Today The Naked Loon is proud to introduce our very own advice column “Question the Kostyra,” in which Naked Loon Living Editor Martha Kostyra will answer your questions about life, relationships, and which espresso stand is most deserving of your valuable patronage.

If you have a question for Martha, just fill out our handy contact form to drop her a line. Today Martha dishes out her wisdom to a pair of distressed Seattle-area readers.

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Putting Laziness to Work for You

Laziness: it’s not just for sitting around the house anymore. Here in America, the land of such groundbreaking inventions as the recliner and the the diet pill, we have become the world leader in laziness. But how can you make laziness work for you?

The personal benefits of laziness are limitless, but for now let’s limit our focus to one area… say, parking lots.

One great way to exercise the power of laziness in the parking lot is to never park more than four spaces away from the front of an aisle…


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A Comprehensive Guide to Alternative Transportation

Has the high price of gas got you considering alternate ways of commuting to work, but there are so many options that you find yourself paralyzed with indecision? Can’t get those darn little shoulder-dudes to shut up with their non-stop debate over the merits of driving alone to work in an earth-killing smog machine?

Maybe Naked Loon staff are the only ones with a shoulder-dude problem, but fortunately we won’t let that stop us from bringing you this exhaustive guide to all your transportation options. Read on and be enlightened.


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How To: Deal With Annoying Neighbors

When you moved to the city to be close to all the amenities that Seattle has to offer, you forgot to consider one important factor: living in the city means living close to other people—yuck.

Unfortunately, if you want to live in the city (and who doesn’t), you are going to have neighbors. Dealing with people can be a stressful experience, but there are some easy tricks you can use to diffuse the situation when your neighbors get on your nerves.


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Better Living Through Internets

Hey, you’re not some kind of loser, are you? Of course not. So, it’s time you stopped spending your evenings and weekends sitting on a park bench trying to goad squirrels and pigeons into fighting each other. It’s time to make something of yourself. It’s time to get on the internets.

In the past we have discussed the how of getting internet, but not the why. So let’s talk about all the amazing things internet can do for you.


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Important Household Safety Advice

With all the dangerous things that abound out there in that big scary world, it can be tempting to succumb to paralyzing fear, never setting foot outside the safe and familiar confines of your home. Unfortunately for you, even your own home is full of perilous life-threatening hazards that can easily terminate your existence quicker than you can say “organic.”

Luckily for you, The Naked Loon has yet again come to your rescue by compiling this helpful guide to household safety. Read on to learn more about the most dangerous parts of your house, and how you can protect yourself and your family.


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Tips for a Fun and Death-Free Independence Day Weekend

Independence Day—a day when all America shirks responsibilities like work and heads outside to barbecue with friends and blow stuff up in remembrance of our country being awesome. Truly this is exactly what the Founding Fathers had in mind when they signed the Fourth of July Party Proclamation that kicked off this yearly tradition so many years ago.

As Benjamin Franklin once said, an empty bag will not stand upright. In that spirit, and in order to assure that everyone can have a fun holiday weekend free of exploding death and dismemberment, The Naked Loon has compiled this helpful guide to Independence Day in the Seattle area.