Like many other discoveries in “Science”, Michael Faraday discovered “Electrity” accidently, while experimenting with thin strands of copper insulated with bees’ wax and “Magnets”[1] to keep evil spirits trapped inside his cauldron.

Once trapped, they soon found out they had little choice but to do Faraday’s bidding or face being extinguished by means of Holy Water.

Faraday initially tasked the spirits with putting the judge in a suitably compromising position to escape prosecution at his trial for witchcraft.

However, it quickly became apparent that the spirits would need to be restrained to more mundane tasks to avoid raising eyebrows in the higher echelons in the Theocracy.

New “Units of Measurement” had to be devised for this electrical system given that it was somewhat more difficult to explain than previous “Scientific Discoveries”.

While the official descriptions are intentionally obscure, the Discovery Institute has exposed the real meaning beind them.

There are:

Voltage – a measure of how much pain the evil spirits currently in and therefore how much work they’ll do.

This can be calculated as follows:

Drops of Holy Water / Number of Spirts * Volume of Cauldron

Amperes simpy refers to the number of spirits in the Cauldron.

Occasionaly, there can be security lapses in Faraday’s system and a spirit can escape through person nearest the breach. Like a faith healing, convulsions can occour but unlike a faith healing they try to kill the poor sod. Sometimes they succeed.

1. Magnet is a poorly disguied anagram for “Get Man”.
When a witch is of marriagable age she performs the ritual of stroking a phallic shaped piece of iron with an egg shaped piece of iron while chanting.
When the two stick together the ritual is complete.

So far, I’ve swiped some Beatles songs, and am copying a video I downloaded from a Harvard website.

[Editor's Note: Someone apparently has serious problems with reading comprehension, with respect to both the no swearing comment policy and the nature of this site.]

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Then we get the ‘TARDs, complete with “open mind”s (TM). bleh.

/es

that’s the great thing about intelligent motion. if it is His will I can throw a neanderthal skull into orbit (real far).

A hoax of a hoax. This seems about as physically possible as being beaten to death with your own skull.

You said, “i think it is unscientific and dishonest to believe that complex systems can arise naturally”

In your world crystals don’t exist. Eggs do not grow into animals. Ecosystems cannot form. Planets cannot orbit. Chemistry does not work… etc.

(Willful)ignorance doesn’t hurt, but it can kill…