Retailtastic
Shoppers bravely venture into local retail and live to tell the tale.
That Fresh From the Farm Feeling
You’ve always envied farmers and their ability to come home from a long day at work, and just relax in a nice warm bath of cow’s milk and unwind. Well now you too can get that feeling, thanks to this “Wholesome Milk Bath” available only at your Ross Dress for Less outlet.
That’s right, Ross doesn’t just carry grotesquely out of fashion and damaged clothes. They also have a wide variety of fine products for the discerning bather.
The text on the bottle says:
Bathe in this luxurious milk bath to give you that “fresh from the farm” feeling!
I don’t know about you, but “fresh from the farm” is exactly what I think of when I think of luxury.
The Wonders of Modern Science
PetCo apparently has some incredibly skilled (and crazy) genetic engineers on staff. Check out the intriguing pet they’re selling (I circled the important area in yellow).
Aquatic parrots! Sweet! Now that is a scientific breakthrough I can get behind. Yours for only $460 at the Shoreline PetCo.
Welcome to Retailtastic!
Welcome to the new Naked Loon blog Retailtastic, everybody! I love to shop, and I am totally excited about the opportunity to share some of my exhilarating shopping experiences with you all!
Occasionally when I’m out shopping I’ll notice something crazy, and I think “wow, I really wish I could tell a bunch of people about this.” Well now I can! Lucky you!
I’m not one for long drawn out introductions, so let’s just get right into it!
Pictured at right is an interesting product I spotted at Grocery Outlet (one of my favorite places to buy food): 80 Hour Energy Spray. It’s amazing what spray food engineers are able to do these days, isn’t it? 80 hours of energy in a little spray!
This would be perfect for those times when I’ve got a big story to write and I just really need a 3-day burst of energy to get the job done. You don’t even know how many times I’ve just been totally dragging on the floor and thinking “if only I could have an 80 hour burst of energy.”
But 80 hours of energy isn’t all those crazy alchemists have managed to put into a spray. Check out the bottom shelf (click the picture to enlarge it): Sleep Aid Spray and Diet Spray! Sweet!
If you buy some of the 80 Hour Energy Spray, it would probably be a good idea to pick up some Sleep Aid Spray too, in case the energy rush starts to get boring 60 hours in or something. And who doesn’t need some Diet Spray, am I right? Exercise and eating right are so 20th Century.
Sprays are the new pills!
